Crawling for the first time, learning to ride a bicycle, raising your hand to ask a question in school, applying to college, and interviewing for a job all involve risk. If risk occurs, why would we ever do them?
Human beings have a deep and instinctive desire to grow and develop. Although human development requires risk, we are innately wired to try things that help us grow and learn.
Both literally and figuratively, Comfort Zone (CZ) is an important place. Inside our CZ most everything is known, predictable, and within our control. The opposite is true when we venture outside of it.
If we are stuck in our CZ, it will interfere with our growth and development. If it is to be beneficial, it needs to be a place from which we go out and a place to which we return.
Many people fail to develop the skill or habit of doing difficult tasks or dealing with difficult situations by staying inside their CZs. This lack of willingness to try things that are hard or demanding can often lead to a lack of success or effectiveness in the workplace or in our personal lives.
To experience and enjoy all that life has to offer, we need to move outside our CZ, which is where risk is involved. When we risk, we come face to face with the fear of failure and fear of Other People’s Opinions (OPOs). If we want to grow and develop, if we want to get better, being open and listening to the feedback or opinions of others is tremendously important; however, when OPOs are not in our best interest or limit us in some way, then we need to take a different approach. We need to discount the opinions and make decisions based on our own desires or goals. Otherwise, we are allowing our lives to be governed merely by a thought that exists in someone else’s head.
A great example of the realization and navigation can be seen in Tom Cody’s example below:
“As a ninth-grader, Tom’s son Brendan took the Top 20 class his father was teaching. As his teacher, Tom helped him become aware of OPOs. Six months later, Brendan announced that he was going to try out for the school’s varsity golf team. Tom quickly advised him that his game was not ready for the varsity team and that he should wait a year before trying out.
Brendan recognized the advice as an OPO and thanked his father for the opinion. Then, deciding that the opinion was not in his best interest, he asked Tom for a ride to golf tryouts. Brendan not only made the varsity team that year, but he also eventually went on to work as a golf pro. In this instance, Tom the father was less effective than Tom the teacher. Fortunately, Brendan listened to the teacher.”
Let’s put Growing Through Risk Into Action:
- How would you describe experiences that you have had outside your Comfort Zone?
- What habits do you experience in your Comfort Zone that are:
- In your best interest?
- Not in your best interest?
- Identify someone’s opinion of you that has kept you in your Comfort Zone.
- What is this opinion?
- Why does it have power to keep you in your Comfort Zone?
- What is something outside your Comfort Zone that you would like to experience, achieve, or become?
If you would like to explore these ideas on a deeper, more deliberate level, you can find all of what you need in our book, Rebalanced Thinking, Rebalanced Living: Developing Your Inner Life Through Social-Emotional Learning.
Thanks from our Top 20 Team,…Tom, Willow, and Kevin
Kevin Brennan
Director – Top 20 Training
kevin@top20training.com
651-373-0297
